They say when you feel down looke at someone who got it worse than you. They are probably right, whoever 'they' is.
I just down feel like looking at others at the moment. Wallowing in self pity seems more appealing.
It'll take some time for this to wear off...
I have a lot of friends who secretly have a live-in maid (usually Indonesian). I say secretly because people, women especially don't like to publicize that they have a maid taking care of their children. There is a feeling of inadequacy in the air when you tell people you have a maid. As if you don't love your children as much since you are willing to put them in the care of an Indonesian lady.
I don't get it.
So, your Indonesian maid is not a person who deserve the benefit of the doubt? So, she doesn't have a heart with the capability of loving your children (never the same as you love your kids of course) too? So, if she's a foreigner then she's definitely going to feed your kids dirt and hit your children when you're not looking? Why so gloom?
Alhamdulillah. I have a maid who is patient with my boisterous toddler. I have a maid who is gentle with my sweet 2-month old boy. I have a maid who can take my mood swings and sometimes prudish nature and turn it into something we both can talk about and laugh at together sometimes.
I am her employer, I am her boss but I also consider myself her daughter-like friend. And many times, I am the one learning from her the art of parenting. She learns from me and I learn from her too.
Without her, I won't be able to have my morning runs. Without her, I won't be able to have my me time to keep me sane. Without her, I won't be able to go for circles or talks and have a peace of mind enough to listen to what is being discussed. Without her, I won't be able to do a lot of things. When I am able to do something good (unrelated to motherhood) because of her, I will send a small prayer that she will receive some of the rewards (pahala) too.
Don't get me wrong. WAHM, SAHM, working mommies who look for the best babysitter for their children or best nurseries for their children - they all have my respect in their choices of childcare. But please, take a more positive outlook towards foreign live-in maids.
Yes, there are a lot of very bad apples out there and it's compulsory to be careful. But not all of them are monsters. A lot of them are mothers trying to make a living for their children too. They are all human beings.
Yes, you are taking a chance with them but aren't we all are in life?
Our parents generation and the generation before that were taught that if you don't study hard, if you aren't successful in your studies - you will not go far in life, you will fail. How do you get a good job with a good salary without good results? That was how we were brought up too.
And so we grew up having a mindset that a good 'secure' job is everything in life. We grew up thinking that it doesn't matter if you have a poor attitude or you cheat and lie or you let others down as long as you succeed. And once we get a good job, then everything will be great. Or so we thought.
We forget that Rizq is not just the money we have, the food we eat or the clothes we wear - Rizq is also the happiness and contentment we experience in our life in everything that we do. The baraqah we feel is also a form of Rizq, the best form. And that is not from having a good job with a huge payslip.
It comes from how sincere we are with what we do, how kind and considerate we are to to others, how we make it a point to share our time and our wealth (note: time is so much more valuable than wealth in reality) with others less fortunate than us - ultimately from being thankful with every little thing we were given.
The world is full of corruption now because we have forgotten what it means to be human and what's truly important in life. And that is what we should teach the next generation. That is real education.
Straight A's? It's doesn't mean anything if you are not a good person who's sincere, kind to others and fight for a greater good. That's the legacy we should leave our children with.
P/S: Woke up thinking who I want my sons to grow up being and end up writing this. May Allah guide them always. Ameen.
